The air is thick and so are we

South Floridians know well that as the humidity rises, the natural and holy constraints on human behavior seem to fall away, and not a day goes by without at least one truly bizarre story in the local paper. A few recent examples.

For starters, here's a headline from the final days of a hotly contested Democratic primary race:

• Battle of the robocalls: Greene enlists Star Jones after Pelosi phones for Meek in Dem Senate primary

(In a turn of events that will puzzle political scientists for decades to come, the Jones charisma offensive failed to sway the voters, and Kendrick Meek prevailed handily over Jeff Greene in the primary.)

The odd behavior is not limited to politics:

• A Miami Dolphins defensive end lost his 2.5 carot diamond earring at practice.
  
  
• When a man in Delray Beach came across a dead whale that had washed up on the sand, he knelt down and cut away two feet of the beast, including its tail. He wanted to eat it, and according to a reporter, "said he wasn't worried about health issues because the body still was warm and there was only one fly on it."
  
  

There is a subtle poetry to this one, like a haiku written by Ned Clampett.

Fla. man driving lawn mower charged with DUI

ANTHONY, FLA -- A central Florida man has been charged with DUI for driving a lawn mower drunk

Marion County Sheriff's Office spotted Richard Paschen driving the read lawn mower with a cup of beer sitting in the cup holder Friday night.

He told Deputy Gary Miller he'd had "a pretty good bit" to drink and had gotten lost on his way home. Paschen refused a breath test

Pasken has had several DUIs and his driver's license has been suspended.